We have weekend visitors to Stepford tomorrow. Obviously this has necessitated a long, wine-fuelled (Sauvignon Blanc for the boys, chilled Saumur-Champigny for me) discussion over what to feed them. After we had spent well over an hour planning a menu, it became increasingly obvious that we were more enthused about the shopping and the cooking than the actual business of having guests.

Our household of four consists of one American boy, one Englishwoman, one Frenchman and one Bassett Hound of indeterminate parentage, so the final menu reads:

Lunch (à la Française)
Quiche aux asperges avec sa petite salade aux noix (asparagus quiche w/walnut salad)
Céleris-raves en remoulade (Celeriac with mustard mayonnaise)
Betterave au chèvre (Beetroot/Beets with goats cheese)
Pavlova aux fruits de saison (Meringue & whipped cream with whatever looks gd in the market)

Afternoon snack (to keep us going)
Watermelon martini shots (Grey Goose vodka) and coriander (cilantro) granita

Supper in the style of the Americans
Barbecued (Grilled) steak
Baked Idaho potatoes
Tomato & mozzarella salad
Grilled New Jersey corn (on the cob) with melted butter
Le moelleux au chocolat (Individual chocolate cakes with melted centres) & vanilla ice cream

Breakfast – again, American
Home made waffles
Whipped double (heavy) cream & sifted icing (confectioners) sugar
Cantaloupe & berries
Fried bacon
Very strong coffee
Freshly squeezed orange juice

For the guest bedroom
Evian
Tin of shortbread biscuits